did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
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