Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
