I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
