It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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