Non-Jews are for practice
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I love you. Go after that dick
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
