it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
