they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
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