Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
