ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
These tits shall not be calmed
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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