i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
