so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize