last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
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