youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
