Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Randomize
