do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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