He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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