If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
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