just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
