i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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