dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
my sisters under your porch take her home
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
