Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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