You're my little dorito
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Randomize
