Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
