see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
