Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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