they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Randomize
