I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Randomize
