Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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