Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize
