i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Randomize