Your tits are I can't wait for
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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