I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
