He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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