we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
