i already hear my dad disowning me
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
