My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
These tits shall not be calmed
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
