so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Randomize
