Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
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