its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
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