what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
time to smoke my breakfast
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Randomize
