he looks like a really good dad on facebook
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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