were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
