my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
