How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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