So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
