chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
This is my gift to your gina
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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