covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I met the friendliest cop last night
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
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