Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Randomize
