Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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