I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize